kitteke:

You’re very into your ‘spiritual eroticism’. How does that work for a married woman? 

As a married woman, I made a commitment to someone fantastic.  I like being in a monogamous relationship. I made that commitment after not necessarily being monogamous with other people but once I met [husband Mark Hawley], it was love at first sight for me. It wasn’t for him but that’s OK. He was a front-of-house sound engineer.

So you slept with the staff? 

Yes. I won him round with patience and by keeping the way I felt secret for ten months. I had my beady eye on his calves as he walked around in shorts and Caterpillar boots. I knew my world was going to turn upside down. I was about to buy a house with another guy when I saw him walk in the room. I was at the piano and a whole group of people walked in and I saw him, and my heart stopped. I called one of my friends and she said: ‘Girl, it’s over for you. If you buy that house, keep the receipt.’ Then my thing fell apart and his fell apart, all without me saying anything. And finally, we were at the same place at the same time.

And you jumped him? 

No. I brought him a cup of tea and I said:  ‘I think I have a crush on you.’ And he said: ‘There’s only one answer to that: a date.’ We went out to dinner and he got a migraine.

Did you believe that he had a migraine? 

He looked at me and said: ‘Bloody hell, I can’t believe this is happening.’ I got him a cold cloth, put it on his head, put him to bed and sat on the couch. The next day, it all changed. We went on a picnic and have been together ever since. It’ll be 17 years this October.